Local survivor to speak at St. Marys community session on intimate partner violence

Sydney Touzel to share her experiences in hopes of encouraging others to seek support

Sydney Touzel will share her experiences with intimate partner violence as a featured speaker at Stop Violence Against Women Perth County’s St. Marys community information session at Little Falls Public School Feb. 17 from 6:30-8:30 p.m.

By Galen Simmons

When St. Marys and area residents gather at Little Falls Public School on Feb. 17 to learn more about intimate partner violence, they’ll hear from someone whose life was nearly taken in that very parking lot.

Domestic-violence survivor Sydney Touzel will be the featured speaker at the Stop Violence Against Women (StopVAW) Perth County community information session in St. Marys from 6:30-8:30 p.m. The event is part of a countywide series aimed at helping residents recognize the signs of intimate partner violence, respond safely and understand the supports available close to home.

For Touzel, the invitation came at the same time she was planning a fundraising half-marathon for Optimism Place Women’s Shelter and Support Services in Stratford, and the timing felt impossible to ignore.

“It just kind of worked out timing-wise,” she said. “I’ve always wanted to somehow use what happened to me to help people, but these two things just kind of landed in my life and I was like, ‘Well, I don’t want to say no now.’ ”

On Feb. 12, 2020, Touzel was attacked and nearly killed by her former partner in her car outside Little Falls after dropping off her young son. She survived the assault, but the attack and the years of abuse leading up to it changed the course of her life. Since then, she has been rebuilding, parenting and slowly deciding how and when to speak publicly about what happened.

At the Feb. 17 session, she doesn’t plan to retell every detail.

“I don’t really plan on sharing my whole story. I mean, you can only hear it so many times,” she said. “I more so want to share the things that people maybe don’t really realize or are too scared to leave for these reasons – like the court process for one. My court process was horrendous. And I know a lot of times that can deter people. … I kind of want to lean more towards those processes and how they were for me because I know that sometimes those things alone are enough for people to not want to come forward or leave the situation they’re in.”

Touzel said she’s especially hoping to connect with other parents who feel trapped between their own safety and fears about what might happen to their children if they leave.

“I’m hoping (to see) mothers like me,” she said. “ … I’m hoping that I can kind of relate to some mothers who have gone through it or are wondering, ‘How do I get out and protect my kids?’ And hopefully I can speak to that.”

Returning to Little Falls for the event will be its own emotional milestone.

“I haven’t been back to the school since COVID,” she said. “I haven’t even been in that parking lot since. So, I think the whole thing is going to be a little bit of a journey for me, but I don’t know. I’m hoping it’s going to go well.”

Touzel also hopes the location, and the fact that she grew up in St. Marys, will help the message land with a local audience.

“In a town like St. Marys, everyone knows everyone, right?” she said. “I grew up with the teachers that were at the school the day it happened … and I feel in a town like this, especially when all the first responders are mostly people we all know too, it’s a little bit harder to come forward or to go to someone you trust because they might know your partner or they know your parents or something like that. And so, I’m hoping by coming forward and being able to talk about what happened to me that it might give someone just a little bit of courage to do something, to talk to someone.”

Ultimately, Touzel wants people to leave the session believing reaching out is worth it, even when it feels terrifying.

“I hope I can maybe give them a little bit of peace of mind even though these situations are the hardest thing you’ll go through and coming forward is going to be terrifying; nine times out of 10, it feels more terrifying than actually just staying in the situation. But it does get better,” Touzel said. “You just have to take one step forward. And telling people; tell one person in your life because they can help, … which is something I never did. No one in my life knew, and if I would have just told my mom or my dad or a best friend, I probably could have gotten out of this a lot sooner than I did.”

The St. Marys session will include a presentation from StopVAW on the different forms of intimate partner violence, warning signs and practical ways to support someone who might be experiencing abuse. Local service providers, including Optimism Place, will be on hand to answer questions and connect people with resources in a low-pressure setting.

The event is free with food, drinks and parking provided. Registration is requested only to help plan refreshments and can be completed online at stopvaw.ca under the Events tab. No personal information collected for registration will be used beyond planning for the evening.

Anyone concerned about intimate partner violence can contact Optimism Place’s 24/7 support line at 519-271-5550 or 1-800-265-8598.